Grief, we’ve all experienced it, for most of us we’re still going through it. From feeling sad because our first goldfish died to our grandparents passing. I’ve learnt that there are different depths of grief and everybody experiences it in various ways. In this blog I will explain how creativity was my way of healing and getting me through the emotions that I felt, and often feel when I take myself back. I hope this blog inspires you to be creative with grief.
My experience
In 2016 I lost my Dad to pneumonia and sepsis. Within the space of just a few years our relationship went from playing XBOX and football, to holding onto his arm as we walked in the town because I was so naïve that I thought arthritis was his ONLY problem. It’s weird, although I was aware of him being ill, I was completely oblivious and blinded to how vulnerable and fragile he truly was. However, a distant memory I recollect is that I could NEVER see him if I had a cold/cough, that made sense because people with pneumonia/sepsis are extremely vulnerable to colds.
He passed just a few weeks after my seventeenth birthday. I was really going through it at the time. The research I undertook alone on pneumonia and sepsis caused me enormous amounts of stress because I had to come to terms with the reality of the situation. Not only did I have to deal with his death, but I had to deal with him passing a day before his birthday and one week before Father’s Day. As you can imagine, June, ever since, has been a difficult month for me and my family.
The Creativity of Grief: Let’s talk creative
On the day he passed, I came home and wrote a poem that I recited at his funeral. That day I also wrote a whole song to the instrumental of ‘Lost Boy’ by Rubi B. I really resonated with the lyrics in the song and couldn’t help but think of my Dad at the time. From THAT day I realised The Creativity of Grief. I understood quickly that there are creative ways to deal with all the emotions that I was feeling. I started writing, dancing and singing more. Grief has helped shaped my work ethic. Everything I do comes down to the mentality of living life to the fullest and being grateful for every opportunity.
“There was a time when I was alone
Nowhere to go and no place to call home”
(Rubi B)
At the time, when my Dad passed and I listened to the song: ‘Lost Boy’, I did feel alone, and I lost my home in human form. Why and how did I become creative?
When we grieve, it’s so important to have ways that we can vent and express ourselves. How can we be creative with it? How can we turn such a negative experience into a positive outlet? Looking back at myself four years ago, I am so grateful that I choose creativity as a well to deal with my experience. My Dad to this day inspires me to be creative and keep growing. I see grief as the root of a tree, and I am the leaves and branches. I am always learning from my experience and creativity gives me a platform to express.
If there is anything you take from this blog, please let it be to channel your grief into something creative. Write about it. Speak about it. Dance about it. See creativity as your friend, your support system.
Thank you for reading my blog.
S-barks.