‘Some days I am more wolf than woman and I’m still learning how to stop apologising for my wild’
I don’t indulge in the whole ‘new year, new me’ thing but I do think the start of a new year is a great opportunity to reflect on what has happened, what is to come, and who you need to be at this stage in your life.
Upon recent reflection, I have decided to actively be unapologetic.
Unapologetic is defined as; not acknowledging or expressing regret.
For me, a big part of this is the acceptance that we are in no position to change the past. A plentiful future cannot flourish if you’re carrying pain from the past.
Carrying trauma from the past creates an impending fear within us about what could happen in the future, However, fear has no place in your life for it keeps you static. Consistent levelling up cannot be achieved whilst static.
Previously, I’ve been my own worst critic. Holding myself accountable for events with no fixed cause. Paralleling myself against unrealistic standards causing me to have an unhealthy self- image and subsequent unhealthy relationships. There were times when I would refrain from expressing myself through fear that people won’t care, or they won’t approve. I’d be with loved ones or friends and say things like ‘I know it sounds silly but…’ or ‘I know you’re not into this stuff but…’ Ultimately, these are expressions of inadequacy.
An inadequate perception of yourself will not allow your to be the best version of yourself and achieve your objectives. Visualise daily where you see yourself in the future. Do not focus on the fear of how you will get there but rather the feeling that will come with reaching your goals. It does not matter if you don’t know how things will manifest just yet, you just need the innate, burning belief that it will happen.
Do not apologise for who you are, the scale of your dreams, your successes or your struggles.
Don’t make yourself and your visions smaller for other people. You shouldn’t have to lessen yourself to make others feel more comfortable. Support and promote others who genuinely connect with your vision. One sided support fuels resentment and is therefore counterproductive.
Create your own mantras and remind yourself of them:
I am intelligent.
I am thoughtful.
I am a good friend.
I am an attentive listener.
I make people laugh.
I am super organised.
I am an incredible dancer.
I am a whole- hearted lover.
I am passionate.
I express how I feel.
I am sensitive.
I know my value.
These are my mantras and I’m not apologetic for any of these things anymore.
I encourage you to unapologetically unleash your potential and stop seeking permission or validation. Understand your value and love yourself accordingly. Be kind to yourself, but critical too (it’s the only way to improve). Produce great work. Connect with and nurture your creativity.
Here’s to an unapologetic 2019.